1. |
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I’ve been gone for a while
Looking out and wondering why
All the stars in my eyes
look further than I thought they would from here up above…
Up above the whole world
where I’ve floated for years
If I could come back down,
I’d soon be near
When I’m back, I’ll see you
I just got word it could be soon
I’ll remember to believe
that the ground beneath
my feet is ground
no matter what I actually
Think I believe when I see you with me
If I could come back down,
I’d soon be near
I wait and wait for news
I’m leaving here
But all I ever see is light
just now reaching me
But all I ever see Is light
just now reaching me
From a star or the moon?
I’d pick my light to come from you
Which works pretty nice
when standing right in front of you
But I’m still far away
All these days blurring by
‘til I’m on my way
The day will come for me to reappear
Back on the ground in time
to see you clear
To see you clear
To see you clear
To see you clear
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2. |
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alright
i turned out all right
turned out just fine
but for a second i was
so in the moment
present in aloneness
cast to the bottom, bound
with the forgotten, i was
so down
no one around
now I AM THANKFUL FOR THE FRIENDS THAT I’VE FOUND, i was
ready to settle for
a nice bronze medal
instead of hurting while i
bore the burden of my
forever mind
slightly resigned
basically blind, my
forever mind
na na na na
alright
it’s gonna be fine
it goes a lot quicker when you
take your time, though it
feels like forever
it almost never is
you’re getting better
you’re getting distance from the
forever mind
leave it behind, too
loosely defined, the
forever mind
na na na na
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3. |
Lynn Wynn - Arlene 2
01:11
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You said, “I’m sure you can tell
Grandma’s not doing well”
But grandma hasn’t called me for days
Said, “Things sure looked bleak
For a couple of weeks”
But when I visit her it still feels the same
Grandma Arlene
Oh grandma Arlene
My grandma Arlene has not died yet
Grandma Arlene
Oh grandma Arlene
My grandma Arlene has not died yet
She won’t be satisfied until she has tried it
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4. |
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And I hope I am ok
I’m not catching my breath
Hope I don’t get it now
Heaven sends for me
I don’t want no mercy kill
Head over my hands
Reggie, no, no again
Reggie, no, don’t
Fight Me
All other girls are breaking me down
You’re just like me
Falling asleep right off the ground
We’re chemically symmetric again
Does it haunt you?
All other trees are blowing around
Making a noise, I love this sound
We’re breaking the sun
The sun
Breaking the sun
Sun
Hand in hand we’re walking in the ocean
Creating cave trade, primitive totems
All along I’m making murmurations that are Different
We’re breaking the sun
The sun
We’re breaking the sun
Falling out at sea
Kiwi-plasticine
I’m pricking and poking at you
Twins hairs standing still
Middle finger fangirl
Terminal vertigo
I fell
I’ll make it up to you again, how?
Come and say it now
Crawling over, make a phone call
Brother Bishop feels a little less taller
Follow freaky hound, make me wanna keep you around
Pony stroking, and I’ll send it by car
You’re just like me
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5. |
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6. |
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God help me, I’m alone again
Wanting something I can’t have and won’t win
Is it because I won’t let them in?
Mean and closed off, with no end and no beginning
I tried to be myself
I tried to find some help
I tried to be honest
I have nothing to prove
I have nothing to lose
Except my bluebonnet
Except my bluebonnet
Drawn to me, we’re alone again
With a glowing TV and all the lighting dimmed
Distance and time combined for a tragic night in
Been a long time since I’ve known this kind of sting
I’ll try to be myself
I’ll try to find some help
I’ll try to be honest
I have nothing to prove
I have nothing to lose
You are my bluebonnet
You are my bluebonnet
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7. |
raisins - moon two
06:06
|
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8. |
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By the time we arrived the funeral,
I had worn holes through my shoes,
You said your daddy
Would share what he had, he
Would have a spare pair I could use.
But they were were too big for my body,
Your father was large he was tall,
Even with clothes,
Stuffed into the toes,
I couldn’t fill them at all.
I can’t in good faith recommend it,
I don’t know no one who could,
I’m sorry to hear it
If I wasn’t clear it’s
A struggle to be understood.
You said “I’m so disappointed,”
I said “that’s not what I meant,”
You took my hand
And said “boy, understand,
It was worth every dollar we spent.”
I’ve never been good with a passing,
Though I overly dwell on the past,
I run from the hurt,
Getting blood on my shirt,
So aware of the shadow I cast.
It was too much for me then,
I am too much for it now,
If there’s a heaven
Then I’ll try again
But I’m giving that hope up for now.
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9. |
Jaydeux - Okay
02:43
|
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I recently realized
That happiness is a mat
I do in fact keep on my doorway
It’s alright, it’s okay
It’s alright, it’s okay
And it could end in an instant
And eventually all our hearts break
But I recently realized
That I’ll get so much morphine on that day
I can take it
So it’s alright, it’s okay
It won’t hurt–at all!
I recently realized
That everything cliche
That I avoided for so long
Is totally fine
So catch me at TGI Friday’s
For happy hour, or the game
Or maybe we’ll go?
Try to catch a foul ball
And make sense of something
With nothing at all
It’s alright, it’s okay
It’s alright, it’s okay
It’s alright, it’s okay
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10. |
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I'm still a boy filmed against his will. Moving Pictures don't suit me.
I never chose, nor was asked how I'd feel
But the role it still chose me.
And so the reel turns freely.
Can't predict how the first one's gonna end, the conflict's just too great.
Now the sequels are signed and my heart sinks, a new hero, but his fight is the same.
And so the reel turns again.
And if you see my deep in that abyss, just know that I'm getting out.
And if you see you deep in that abyss, I know we're getting out.
I think it's just a little further now. I see that horizon now. I think it's hust a little further out, that end is coming...
The last frames project their light on me and everything will changed.
Though scratched and jittered that silver screen. It knows just what to say.
And it makes a boy feel seen.
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11. |
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Hey Clark I’ve been sinking down
I can’t keep up with all these modern hounds
Have you seen reBekah recently?
Every time that we talk it’s just logistically
about splitting up our shared bank accounts,
and should we file single, married; separate, joint? How
do we decide who gets to go out to eat
with our friends in town this coming week
And when I ask how do you respond when
people ask what happened between us then
you say “you left me, there’s nothing more to it”
she’s kind of right, and that still feels a bit simplistic
It’s been difficult to know what to expect
I’ve been alone for months, it feels I can’t come back
from self-isolation under the guise of growth
I tried to give you space, but i lost my foothold
on a group of friends that made me feel fulfilled
we spent so much time with them that i lost the will
or just the guts to do what was best for me,
I can’t exonerate myself, I just wasn’t happy.
well maybe, sometime in the near future
we can be friends? i dont even see you anymore on weekends
i know its weird for me to feel bad
cause i was the one that left, but you were so bad at
noticing when i lied through my teeth
when i had to choke out those three famous words i played at falling asleep,
OR chewing food, or just slipping away
pretending i did not hear you, I knew what you say, (What’d you say?)
I go walking along the river trail
the moonlight makes the branches look so pale…
sorry Clark, you can see I’m sinking fast
i can’t keep up with all these local bands.
END with the conversation,
Am I being overbearing??
seems like i am oversharing…
|
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12. |
||||
Life is long, that’s what i tell myself
Reading your letter again, denver airport again
I saved two hundred dollars, five hour layover
Thought I might find some comfort
Trying on duty-free perfume
Duty-free
It itches my skin, it smells sweet
It blends in, smells like defeat
Feels like surrender and I’m not gonna answer you this time
And I’ll make a home in your quiet
/
I can see us still
Treading water
Almost nude
Now underwater
Lake michigan is brimming over our concrete pew
What did I take from you?
Left me empty-handed
Swimmin in my shoes
Am I empty handed?
Lake michigan is still holding this love I keep for you
Underwater
I like it when we’re underwater
So quiet when we’re underwater
Not so heavy
Underwater
I like it when we’re underwater
So quiet underwater
Not so heavy
Underwater
I like it underwater
So quiet underwater
Not so heavy
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13. |
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I ran into you the other day
Sitting on the porch
“I’m moving to Eugene,” you said
“We’re getting a divorce”
What do I say here?
It all comes flooding back to me now
When five years ago…
Wave white flag and surrender
A whispering tells me:
“Ben, now you should leave”
Three years here, no relief, no resolution
Heavenly bother, two loves lost
One in the sky and one I forgot
I lived in an attic, I lived in a tent
The few possessions that I still have
All fit in a box
(Mmm)
In my last month here there were clouds of swirling yellow horrible choking smoke outside and all around me and my life
Now I will go to somewhere more familiar
But we all know that you can never, ever go back to where you have been before, can you?
There is one thing I miss about my time in Eugene: when I lived there I had time to see the beckoning magic
Now I just go to my job
There has to be something more
But how do I find it?
Let me know
Just this once
(Hmm)
I want to “know” something!
Not no not “belief”
No no not “believe”
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14. |
||||
I'm sitting in a room with it,
all my Mormon heritage
Francie taught me this little trick
Some quick step into mindfulness
Like, imagine it isn't part of you
It's just the song playing in this cafe
Forgive the jukebox for not playing your tune
Or ignore it or put in a quarter or walk away
Even when it's playing pretty loud
Intruding all your personal space
I came here to read, but my focus is shifting
To my mom's dad, intensely listening
No man knows my history
no man passed down this mystery
no man converted my ancestry
no man in the New York spring
No man knows my history
no man gave christ to the Cherokees
no man older than just fourteen
no man in a grove of trees
And you know, it still holds my attention
But then, here comes my old man, joined by his dad, and his dad
Clinkin together three cups of coffee
Like glasses of wine
Saying “few can compare my mythology,”
Saying “this is the path walked by humanity”
My mom actually said that
Saying “this is the spring which brings forth fruit”
And this and that
My dad never cared much for music but he sure loves the drink
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15. |
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So it’s final
Snap your wristband now
Summer camp of Young Men Forgot
In Arcadia
Here our plot grows green
How I miss you
Quickened and sickening
One more holiday
To make the landing harder
Touching down, away
To your own apartment
Do you want to stay
Trapped pawn to pawn with no way
Out except someone else,
Black knight, or kill the self player
World is fine though
It manifests in snow
I skate eastward when the canal froze
Wrote our names in
Material so cold
And it’s gone now, winter got and spring sold
Meet me at holiday
Oh you have proved me wrong
We need to get away from these mirrored cities
Would you like to stay
Trapped palm to palm like a clam
Ever lacquering sand
I lack that irritant
I like my holiday man
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||||
16. |
Eli Scheer - The Ghost
03:47
|
|||
(sequel to Conversation with an Empty Room)
I was waiting for a chance to shine
You had to arrive on your own time
Took some searching sifting through your mind
Some things just loom larger in the light
I am proud of you
Just for pushing through
Doing what you had to do exploding into view
So whatever you need from me
Whatever you need to be
I am here, I am you, and you are gold
I know it’s hard to see
I know that it’s not easy
Knowing every step is further from the fold
Water rushing in
Where do we begin
Don’t look back, don’t look down, just keep following the sound
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17. |
||||
Every time I close my eyes
I see California skies
Red palms at sunset too
Yellow, pink, and blue
Walking through green canyons with you—
I love it
Blur of orange on the basketball court—
I love it
Every time I’m seeing red
Fade to black…
Baby brings me back
I love it
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18. |
||||
One month gone
Thirty dark and glorious nights
Frightful questions fester
As we search for truth by the slow burning light
Going down down down down
Down down down down
I want to see the light again my friend
I want to see the light again
I want to see the light again my friend
I want to see the light again
One year past
Aching wailing gnashing of teeth
Burning candles flicker
The curling smoke gives to dark apathy
Further down down down down
Down down down down
I want to see the light again my friend
I might forget the light instead
I want to see the light again my friend
I want to see the light again
Decade gone
Silent nights, where nobody speaks,
His bloods is flowing
How much is still dissolved into me
Further down down down
Down down down down
I want to see the light again my friend
I want to see the light again
I want to see the light again my friend
I want to see the light again
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19. |
Lynn Wynn - Thanksgiving
02:37
|
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When your mom
Newly single through no fault of her own
Is in search of a companion
For her twilight years
Who’s gonna be the first one she sees
When she logs on to Match.com?
Some guy named Todd
Really loves dogs
Suspiciously hot for your mom
Turns out he was a bot
Your mom feels turned off
And exhausted when who comes along
To adore her it’s
Dave
Now Dave and your mom are hosting thanksgiving
At his condo in the suburbs and when you ask what you should bring
He says “just bring yourself ;)” and when you get there he’s baking a turkey
And at dinner he makes jokes about being your dad
You’re 40 years old
And now Dave is your dad
And your mom and Dave are kissing on the couch while you’re all watching The Family Stone
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20. |
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Madelyn really wants a baby
I had a dream that we were holding our bellies
It’s not this time
Guess this round of baby is just mine
Going through boxes my mom saved
30 years’ baby clothes interred until this day
I’m dumbfounded
All of the waiting around in
this family, it floors me
I want to burn it all down
And then I see her
In the corner
Sitting silent
Like a specter
Waiting patient
For whatever
For her daughter
For her daughter
Mist on the water
|
Song Club Sampler
A group of pals who write monthly songs to a theme.
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